Study

A delightfully comfortable if somewhat chaotic room. Above the huge granite fireplace hangs a portrait of an elderly, grey-haired gentleman holding a cup and saucer, a large wooden pipe clamped between his teeth, as he poses beside a gramophone and a stack of discs. The fireplace itself was recently refitted to accept etherically-charged plasma as a more eco-friendly heating solution.

On one side of the room sits an impressively sturdy-looking birnamwood desk. And sturdy it needs to be, for the stacks of papers, envelopes, dirty teacups and signed photographs of the Professor awaiting sending out would collapse lesser furniture. A tower of half-finished manuscripts and lyrics sheets look like they could collapse at any moment, which would create a domino effect with the week's backlog of fan mail and the half-eaten plates of cake. Visitors are requested to tread softly and not sneeze anywhere near the desk. A tray labelled "To do - really really quite urgent!", also overflowing with papers, gathers dust and crumbs. Atop the pile sits a scrap of paper bearing the crest of the Inn at the End of Time, a ridiculously large number and the scrawled words "Elemental, pay your bar tab or get barred. Iron barred, that is. Reg."

The Professor has considered employing a personal assistant to tackle the backlog but current workplace Health & Safety legislation forbids mortally endangering an employee.

Upon the woodpanelled walls hang a number of artworks, including original paintings by such greats as Mr. H. Toast and Jamie Smart, and a particularly obscene portrait by a Mr. Clifford Cumber involving the Professor and a waterfall. A framed, sepia-tinted photograph of eight young adults, including a youthful Elemental, hangs alongside them, an inscription on the bottom identifying it as "South Downs, '60".

A recent addition to the study is a sturdy wooden chair that, although slightly too small to actually be comfortable to sit in, does bear the Union Flag as its upholstery on the back, seat and arms which makes it a particularly splendid and British chair. The flags on the back and seat are both, for some unknown reason, upside-down.